strelka
Ржу не могу. Процесс пошел. То ли еще будет.

Не анекдот, но все же.
If World Cup teams were women ...........................
USA - Paris Hilton
NO ONE quite knows how they got where they are but at least the watching world saw them get a good seeing to.
ITALY - Amanda Holden
Despite getting on a bit they still look tasty. But will never lose their reputation for cheating.
GERMANY - Ellen Macarthur
Effective and efficient but not what you'd call easy on the eye and you certainly wouldn't want to be paired off with them.
BRAZIL - Abi Titmuss
Difficult not to admire their form but always sticking their cups in your face at every available opportunity.
ANGOLA - The Ginger One from Girls Aloud
Overshadowed by the more glamorous looking ones of the group and still can't believe their luck getting through.
FRANCE - Pamela Anderson
Once ruled the world but now over the hill. Need to decide on a settled front two to recapture past glories. Fondness of Brazilian's.
Trinidad & Tobago - Jade Goody
Nobody fancied them but they still somehow managed to get a result early days.
HOLLAND - Judie Marsh
Outstanding up front but dodgy everywhere else and permanently orange.
SPAIN - Gwyneth Paltrow
Well fancied strong english connection but when on the big stage it usually ends in tears.
ARGENTINA - Heather Mills McCartney
No matterhow good they look now they will never shake off their dodgy past.

Little Pete came home from the playground with a bloody nose, black eye, and torn clothing. It was obvious he'd been in a bad fight and lost. While his father was patching him up, he asked his son what happened.
“Well, Dad,” said Pete, “ I challenged Larry to a duel. And, you know, I gave him his choice of weapons.”
“Uh-huh,” said the father, “that seems fair.”
“I know, but I never thought he'd choose his sister!”

"Doctor, please hurry. My son swallowed a razor-blade."
"Don’t panic, I’m coming immediately. Have you done anything yet ?"
"Yea, I shaved with the electric razor."

A man gets home, runs into his house, slams the door and shouts, "Honey, I just won the lottery! Pack your bags!"
The wife says, "Great! What should I pack for? The ocean or the mountains?"
He says, "I don’t care! Just be out by the end of the week!"